why, all the more easier to statutorily pluck you with, my dear!

For historical sakes, today was my first today as an employee of Pathmark. I am a cashier. I stand in front of a machine. Customers bring their goods to me. I wave their goods in front of laser beam, then type furiously at a keyboard. Occassionally I will get a disturbed look on my face because the machine vomits and beeps at me. But normally I just wave goods in front of a laser beam, and then place their goods into little plastic baggies. Wee. To be honest, I don’t even know how much I’m getting paid. I just show up with an apron (I have a uniform!) and they give me a till (aka a money tray) and I get to work.

I’ve opted to work in the daytime (like 10am to 6pm). Today, I made an observation. From the morning up until around 4pm, all the cashiers are ugly, old and/or fat people. Nothing against them, that’s just what they are. This struck me as odd. Where are the people my age? That I could befriend or flirt with? At school apparently. Around 4pm, all the cashiers become teenagers. There was a cute girl with curly locks to my left. However, all my advances were halted as I realized all the teenagers had red smocks. I had a blue smock. What’s up with that? According to an older colleague, Pathmark makes all of its underage employees wear red smocks to make it easier to distinguish who’s a minor! That seems like a rather depraved move, to me. Like making Jews wear stars. Or Hindus wearing yellow sleeves in Afghanistan. Ok, maybe not quite the same. but some sicko pervert out there could find some way to exploit this practice for their own needs. And then they could email me. so…um… I could… stop them.. from.. um… doing these bad things.

::sighs:: I refer you to a previous post.

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