“sweet thing”: girl blunder #231

I arrive 20 minutes late to dinner with some old high school friends at Zen Palate on the Upper West Side. I pull up a chair, apologize for my lateness, and try to make sense of the yuppified asian menu. Soon enough, our waitress (who’s cute, of course) comes over and starts to take our order.

Sitting on the outside, I naturally start the order. But hey, I suck at ordering. Of course, on my face, is my classic dumb I’m-clueless-help-me grin. Hurriedly, I ask, “Hmm… what do you think is better, the Nandoo Noodles or the Sweet & Sour Sensational?” She looks at me and says:

“Well, I tend to prefer the noodles, but the sensational is pretty popular with many of our customers, and they tend to really enjoy it.”

“Oh. what’s it taste like?”

“Well, it’s really sweet. Some customers say it’s a bit much and they get sick of it.”

“Oh.”

“Do you like sweet things?,” she asks, and even though I’m looking at my menu, I know she looking straight straight at me with those eyes. “Do you like sweet things,” she says again with a bright smile.

“Ummm…uhh…”

I’m stuttering.. hunched over my menu… and I blurt out while she’s in the midst of another comment, “OK, Nandoo noodles! I’ll take the nandoo noodles!” I peek upward.

She smiles, nods, and moves on.

Now, cmon, [crab], what were you thinking? When a cute waitress smiles and asks you, “Do you like sweet things?”, the appropriate response is a grin, a look into her eyes, and a “Mmm-hmmmm. Just how sweet is it?” Or maybe a “You know I do, sweet thang.” Or even “Uh-huh. Whatchu got to sate me?” The correct answer to “Do you like sweet things?” is never, ever: “Nandoo noodles!”

::sighs:: more reasons why I’m single.

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