boobies on the tubie

I like television. I’ll admit it. When I’m home from school, I plop myself onto the comfy swervy chair and flip on the good ol’ tele. I watch television for three things. One, for information. Watching TV for information is like walking for terminal diseases, but I like to salvage what I can. History channel and TLC are key. Second, for inspiration. I like music videos. Not the ten second clips of MTV’s Total Request Live, but the quality picks of MTV2. I can hardly believe the two stations are owned by the same network. I like watching how people combine the visual with the aural. Thirdly, for the hot people.

Some uncelebrated genius long ago figured out that pretty people sell things, and if you watch the right channels (basic cable, ahem) you can get an eyeful. And let me tell you, beautiful people are entertaining. They can stand, and walk, and even blink. They sometimes even shake things that normal people can’t shake. They also sometimes talk. But I usually mute it when they do that.

Where are all the beautiful babies? If you are a beautiful baby and would like to meet [Selfish Crab], star of the [Selfish Crab] Blog, please see the contact information to your left. Thank you.

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