Selfish Crab

1. The Internet Engineering Task Force (IETF), responsible for many modern Internet standards, votes on proposals by humming. [source]
2. Comedian Steve Martin is a well-regarded banjo player, particularly as a master of the difficult clawhammer style. [source]  [video of his performance on SNL]
3. German athlete Uwe Hohn has what is considered an “eternal world record”.  His 1984 javelin throw of 104.80m shattered the then-record by 15 meters, hitting the edge of the stadium, necessitating a redesign of the javelin and a restart of the records.   [source] [video]
4. In her eponymous feature length movie, Miley Cyrus debuts the “Hoedown Throwdown”, an almost comically-complicated dance step, which I suppose is engineered to sweep the nation with a dance craze.  You be the judge.  [music video]
5. M.I.A.’s dystopian masterpiece, “Paper Planes”, samples its goodness from The Clash’s “Straight to Hell” [music source]

# 2009 May 29    {Links}    #

Really thought it was spelled “phishing”, not “pfishing”

# 2009 May 28    {Columbia, nerd}    #

NY Mag’s Vulture:  Top Ten Sketches of Saturday Night Live, Season 34.  Worth killing an afternoon for, particularly for such a strong season (Tina Fey’s Palin sketches being incredibly impactful .)

Selfish Crab chooses his own overlooked favorites, after the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

# 2009 May 25    {Links}    #

Tweeting Too Hard – the best of self-congratulatory, egocentric tweets out there.  I can only read about 10-12 before the vomit urge rises.  Reminiscent of Overheard in New York: short bursts of entertainment, followed by up-or-down voting.  Except not anonymous at all.

See also:  FMyLife (for schadenfreude), texts from last night (for last night’s regrets/adventures)

# 2009 May 19    {Links}    3

Instead of sleeping, or studying Evidence, I added some “threaded comments” magic to the blog.   You can now reply directly to a comment.  And it will show up nested.

Let’s just say, between we friends, that Wordpress is an under-documented project.  I felt altruistic and added some documentation to their Codex, which involved me cutting and pasting source code comments in their wiki.

I also made my template “widget-aware”.   More changes to come.  Any readers have any feature requests?  I like how I pretend I have hundreds of readers that care fervently how this house is maintained.

# 2009 May 19    {meta, nerd}    5

The learning does not stop just cuz classes are over.  More so if you did not attend 30% of your classes, and opted to, say, enact a “Snowboard Thursdays” policy back in February.  More so if you are reading everything for the first time on the eve of your exams.

- – -

abortifacient – causing abortion; a substance that induces abortions [learned in Comparative Trademark, mind you]

otiose – serving no practical purpose; indolent, idle

eleemosynary – of, relating to, or dependent on charity; Contributed as an act of charity; gratuitous.

terpsichorean – of, or related to, dancing.

- – -

Yes, I have a weakness for obscure “of, or related to…” words.  It started with “pecuniary” and it was all downhill from there.

# 2009 May 18    {law school}    4

The new Wolfram Alpha search engine is impressive. Do I have to know Mathematica to squeeze out more juice from it, or what?   At the least, I am impressed that it is so pretty.   Isn’t this what Askjeeves.com was supposed to be back in 1999? Ask a question, get an answer.

Here are some of my favorite queries so far:

• 10 peanut M&Ms -custom nutritional info (or compare Big Mac and Whoppers)
• t_n – crossword puzzle solver
• Samuel, Samantha – track baby names over time
• CAPTCHA – generate your own captchas
• Korea female/male population, China female/male – one-child policy in full effect
• BMI 5′11″ 170lb – Calculate your own BMI

What’s your favorite query so far?

Update:  If you have no idea what Wolfram Alpha is, Wolfram himself made a great screencast demo of the product.

# 2009 May 16    {nerd}    #

Instead of sleeping, I decided to add some branding to this blog. See image at top right. I actually bought a license to this image from Fotolia. I typed “asshole crab” into its search engine and this is what it returned. “Crab curmudgeon who is in fact a sweetheart underneath it all” returned no results.   It never does.

# 2009 May 15    {meta}    #

Fat off your compliments, I once entertained the idea of writing a book. But then I realized: what would be the fucking point? What would be the grand insight into the human condition that would be imparted by the last page’s turn? What is the filling in my donut? What’s more, four years of blank looks from the snow-in-cabo crowd have emphatically informed me that I am an acquired taste (I am a haughty naughty bawdy.). I do not think I have far to go.

# 2009 May 14    {Life}    7

Dear Lazyweb,

The new, larger Kindle DX is cute, but here’s what I really want:  a dedicated e-ink display as a secondary monitor for the desktop computer.  It’ll cure everyone’s inclination to print out emails, or reports, court opinions, or any long text article.  Maybe have a sort of universal button for display-this-in-my-kindle.    Maybe even mount the display flat on my desk, so I can look down and read it naturally.

thanks,
Crab

# 2009 May 12    {nerd}    1

Scene: subway

Two young people enter my zone on the 4 train platform. She wears Converses and sports a backpack. His face is filled and his hair drapes over his hoodie. It’s too long– is it a wig? They are a couple; their proximity gives them away. He reaches out for her and settles for a curl in her pocket flap. She rests a hand on his chest. They talk quietly. They are a couple. I plug my ears with music and crank it high enough to blind me.

I don’t really want to study; I want to spend my days writing about my FEELINGS and about love and relations and attraction and oh yes about how I FEEL on the inside HURRAY OH GOODIE. How do you feel, reader? In less than 20 words.

# 2009 May 10    {fictive}    3

I find it hilarious that law school is officially over today (exams notwithstanding), and I can barely muster the words for an obligatory post, let alone another profanity-laced screed.   It is clear that I have completely  moved on, as evidenced by my lack of law school posts, my attendance record, and my dearth of class notes.  It’s time.

Does anyone have any questions about law school left unanswered by the Great Crab Experiment 2006-09?

# 2009 May 7    {law school}    #

Yeah I know I just got back.  Yes I know I should be focused on final exams.  But still:

Who wants to walk from point A to point B, through all the heavy squiggles, with me? It will require at least 14 days in August.  Come forward!

If anything, suggest a good “bar trip” itinerary.  We’re supposed to do something epic after we finish this junk.

# 2009 May 6    {Life}    3

p012009ps-1208 by The Official White House Photostream.

Who knew Bam was a FOB?

# 2009 May 3    {Life, Photos}    #

… True love is an algebra problem involving one train heading west at 70 mph, leaving New York at 31 years old, and one train heading east at 30 mph, leaving Adolescence at 33. At what time will the trains pass each other, trade glances, and say hey why not it’s probably about time, yeah? …

…Yeah, love is like a soufflé. It’s all about timing, and about how much chocolate you add. …

… I hear that falling in love is like getting struck by lightning. I interpret this to mean that it rarely, if never, happens. It’s a random personal cataclysm, touching only a select few. No, no, let’s be serious. I am sure love is a smoldering thunderclap, a strike from the heavens, an official sign of approval from High Above. …

… True love is the purest evidence there exists a master plan, that your life has meaning expressed in the form of a complete and total complement. It suggests that life cannot be rudely interrupted by a million stings, that life may roll out in a red carpet after all. And it means the rest of us motherfuckers just aren’t looking hard enough. …

# 2009 May 3    {Life}    #