Last week I house-sat for my travelling parents, who had made one of those returns to the ancestral village, a homecoming tour replete with life fulfillment and awkward greetings with persons unknown but familial.

The house is in fair shape. Everyday, I walked the grounds, checked the fixtures, appraised the shrubbery. That I am a barely-housetrained bachelor is immediately clear from my homemaking skills. Strategic plate re-use is no matter for novices. Considerations must be made to minimize MTBC (Mean Time Between Cleans). Avoid messy sauces. Bowls are versatile; plates, shallow beings. Cereal to soup to rice bowl. Air dry it intertween and the flavors carry over! Of my trademark dinners in which I eat sardines, straight out of the tin, with my hands, someone once quipped: “Good when the end of the world comes, you’ll be ready.” See, I am just a pragmatic croc to your fanciful fox.

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