Snow day meant Partner’s thirteen yr old son idled around the office this afternoon. I thought I would interact with the kid a bit, thought it would curry favor with Partner. Let’s see, what did I like was I was thirteen: oh, I know! Programming languages!
“Michael, Michael, do you know SQL?”.
“You know, databases. SQL, right?”.
Long silence, because I hadn’t mentally prepared for this scenario.
“No? SQL. You haven’t learned SQL yet? S-Q-L. Like MySQL.”
Filling time with an awkward grin.
“Not yet? Don’t you go to school now? I thought you went to some camp for this.”
Partner overhears, intervenes: “hm, no probably doesn’t know that.”
“Oh okay it’s just that I found out our firm website has an SQL injection vulnerability and I thought if you wanted to later we could draft a malformed query to see what can happen maybe cause some hijinks or something yknow if you werent busy. Hey it’s cool no big deal okay gotta get back to go back to work hey slap me five wait what yeah naw dude.”
And so it stands, in ascending order of awkward interactions:
4. Middle aged co-workers
3. Small children
2. Children of middle-aged co-workers
1. Animals; pets