Archive for October, 2010

Things I Learned 2010-10

  • philatelies – n. the collection and study of postage and imprinted stamps, stamp collecting [page 125, Lush Life by Richard Price]
  • giving dap – n.  a form of handshake and friendly gesture that has recently become popular in western cultures, i.e. a fist bump  [page ?, Id.] [more info]
  • Gargling with salt water does indeed mitigate cold symptoms, settling a decade-long argument with my mother [source: NY Times]
  • bottled out – v. slang, UK.  to lose courage [source]
  • reliquary - n. a container or shrine in which sacred relics are kept [source]
  • perspicacious –  adj. having keen mental perception and understanding; discerning: to exhibit perspicacious judgment.  [source: someone at a bar, yes wtf]
  • In NYC, cars must be parked at least fifteen (15) feet from a fire hydrant. [the goddamn hard way] [src: official]
  • appellation – n. a name, title, or designation.
  • Rabelaisian – adj. “to be totally outrageous, raunchy, crude in every way, absolutely stubborn in matters of truth, relentless against hypocrisy, and against all forms of popular opinion; but, also, in a more profound way, it means AXIOM BUSTING.” [encountered] [source]
  • chinoiserie – adj. a French term, signifying “Chinese-esque”, refers to a recurring theme in European artistic styles since the seventeenth century, which reflect Chinese artistic influences.
    [encountered] [source]
  • I hate everything “chinoiserie”.

• From the 'things I learned' dept • #

video: Kanye West – Runaway

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35-minute music video by Mr. West.  I am an unabashed fan of the man.

• From the 'Life' dept • #

Have you visited Eataly yet?  Seriously, now I know how white people feel when they shop in Chinatown.

• From the 'Life' dept • • #

Do you feel like a midware vendor today?

Steve Jobs made a rare appearance on the last Apple earnings call, and unleashed a torrent of opinions on his competitors.  My favorite line remains to be his thoughts on the value his company brings to customers:

In reality, we think the open versus closed argument is just a smokescreen to try and hide the real issue, which is, “What’s best for the customer – fragmented versus integrated?” We think Android is very, very fragmented, and becoming more fragmented by the day. And as you know, Apple strives for the integrated model so that the user isn’t forced to be the systems integrator. We see tremendous value at having Apple, rather than our users, be the systems integrator. We think this a huge strength of our approach compared to Google’s: when selling the users who want their devices to just work, we believe that integrated will trump fragmented every time. (emphasis added)

• From the 'nerd' dept • • #

on nature conservation

The giant panda should be allowed to go extinct.  What kind of animal needs to be actively coaxed to mate and reproduce even in captivity AND has diet that comprises 99% of the time of bamboo, which the giant panda cannot even process correctly because it lacks the organs to digest so much grass, meaning it derives little nutrition or energy from it?   This creature is a disgrace to the Bear family. Plus, what’s with the hamburglar fur?  Is that a genuine Darwinian adaptation or an RNA joke?  Nothing about this animal screams “finely-tuned genetic superstar deserving of perpetuation.”

Giant panda, let’s face it, you are a waste of conservation money.  You are better off butchered and made into steaks because holy shit, you are essentially grass-fed bear, and that sounds delicious.

CRAB WUZ HEA

• From the 'Life' dept • 2

on the environment

It’s not littering if it’s bio-degradable.  You can throw your apple cores where ever you damn well please.

CRAB WUZ HEA

• From the 'Life' dept • #

on relationships

If you are a man, and you find yourself suddenly owning a “butter dish”, whose sole purpose is to contain and display a stick of butter in a mature and age appropriate manner, SURPRISE, check yourself, because you are in a relationship.

CRAB WUZ HEA.

If you find yourself suddenly, without your consent, owning what I can only describe as a “cupcake candelabrum”, which holds up a multitude of cupcakes in a varied and spaced-apart manner, in the air, then congratulations, you are married.

CRAB WUZ HEA.

• From the 'Life' dept • • 2

on marriage

An engagement ring is like a mood ring that only shows one mood: smug.

CRAB WUZ HEA.

• From the 'Life' dept • • 1

RIP LionLink.   DSA hardly knew ye.

• From the 'Columbia', 'work' dept • • 1

giant legless chair art installation in front of U.N. HQ

giant legless chair art installation in front of U.N. HQ by selfish crab.

• From the 'Life' dept • #